poet.

to me, this is such a perfect articulation on love and writing. love this song by Bastille. 

Poet, Bastille

Obsession it takes control,

Obsession it eats me whole.

I can't say the words out loud,

So in a rhyme I wrote you down.

Now you'll live through the ages,

I can feel your pulse in the pages.

I have written you down

Now you will live forever

And all the world will read you

And you will live forever

In eyes not yet created

On tongues that are not born

I have written you down

Now you will live forever

Your body lies upon the sheet,

Of paper and words so sweet.

I can't say the words,

so I wrote you into my verse.

Now you'll live through the ages,

I can feel your pulse in the pages.

I have written you down

Now you will live forever

And all the world will read you,

And you will live forever

In eyes not yet created

On tongues that are not born

I have written you down

Now you will live forever

I have read her with these eyes,

I've read her with these eyes,

I have held her in these hands.

I have written you down,

Now you will live forever.

The virtues in the verse,

And you will live forever.

I have written you down

Now you will live forever

And all the world will read you

And you will live forever

In eyes not yet created

On tongues that are not born

I have written you down

Now you will live forever

home.....

"home is where the heart is".....but what what makes your heart? what makes your home?....


things that have meant home for me:

• my family. especially my mom <3
• my friends and friends who have become family
• the (smell of the) beach
• THE 405 :)
• my kitty
• my childhood pound puppy
• my bed
• being in that certain someone's arms.
• behind closed doors
• the actual house i grew up in

some of these things remain. some do not. some of these are the same. some are not. all of these things still seem like home, but, they are no longer all in one place, or, all possible...


i don't know where my heart is, where my home is....


i do know where my memories are all. all in one place. it is very strange to be there and not feel home.


"home" 
foo fighters

Wish I were with you
I couldn't stay
Every direction
Leads me away
Pray for tomorrow
But for today

All I want is to be home

Stand in the mirror
You look the same
Just lookin' for shelter
From cold and the pain
Someone to cover
Safe from the rain

All I want is to be home

Echoes and silence
Patience and grace
All of these moments
I'll never replace
No fear of my heart
Absence of faith

All I want is to be home
Ooh
All I want is to be home

People I've loved
I have no regrets
Some I remember
Some I forget
Some of them living
Some of them dead

All I want is to be home 

HB (11.28.2009)

what, who, where is your home?....

WORD!

1. i have internet again!! which now means i am liable for posting on a nearly daily basis again.... (and even better i can stalk my favorite blogs and catch up what's been going on!)

2. for amazing friends who remember when you say you want something and get it for you for your birthday months later! so so so excited to fill this in.  

 and really, it was meant to be. this is the cover page. brilliant.

fear is...

‎"Fearlessness is the total presence of fear, with the courage to face it."  OshO

i googled fearless and got taylor swift and colbie calliat song lyrics...one about the fearless high when falling in love. one about being fearless in moving on after the fallout of love. its always about love isn't it?.... 


definition is as "simple" as: free from fear . if only THAT were simple. if only simple were simple.....


my cousin recently posted this and i loved it: 

"But come here fear, 

I am alive. 

And you are so afraid of dying." 

i am not afraid of love. at all. i love love. i might be more afraid of loving....but then when i do i am usually pretty fearless with it. friend. lover. job. song. color. i just LOVE it.  maybe too much? 


free from fear... might be like free to feel. feel whatever it is. for quite possibly only the second time ever in my life i feel free to feel whatever i want to feel...and free of fear for what i may feel.


now to simply figure out what THAT is.